Two hundred sixty-two thousand eight hundred minutes

How do you measure a (half) year in the Life of Smiley?

Actually, it won't take very long; I've only managed to average a paltry six posts per month, although I've logged more posts in December than I did in the first five months combined.

The fact is I just don't have that much to say, which is probably why I waited as long as I did to start blogging in the first place.

I had been reading and commenting on the Prizblog for a while, and in July I finally decided to start a blog of my own in order to respond to a post entitled The Best Comic Book Movie Ever????? Since comic books and movies are two subjects I'm interested in, I found I had a fair amount to say.

At around the same time I happened to read an essay by Paul Graham entitled What You Can't Say. I enjoyed reading this because he managed to put into words so eloquently a feeling that has been growing inside me for some time.

How can you see the wave, when you're the water? Always be questioning. That's the only defence. What can't you say? And why?

Since then I have proceeded to voice my (unorthodox?) views on politics (Gaza, Night Fall) and society (Hot Coffee, torture and capital punishment).

Realizing my limitations when it comes to forming strong and interesting opinions, I decided not to restrict myself to any particular subject area. Whenever I have an opinion on anything, I'll blog it!

I've sprinkled in some thoughts regarding the Patriots and Red Sox, and on the rare occasion that I actually do something interesting, like attending SC|05, I'll write about that too.

Being an engineer, of course I'm interested in engineering and technology, especially how it affects my life (not always in a good way).

Finally, if I see something interesting or funny as I'm wandering the 'net, I'll throw it up here. If I didn't do that I'd probably average less than one post per week.

So that's it. Hopefully in 2006 I'll have something interesting to say, but until then...

Happy New Year!

Why Won't Jane Go to Engineering School?

Interesting article-- here's the Reader's Digest version:

The percentage of female lawyers doubled in three years (from 9.5 percent in 1971 to 20.1 percent in 1974). By 1981 it was 35.8 percent... By 1996, the percentage climbed to 44.4... Although some claims about discrimination and a salary gap between men and women in the law persist, there is no doubt that the scene has changed dramatically... The number of women in medicine and law is projected to stabilize in about a decade, at close to 50 percent.

Which brings us to our profession: engineering. The participation of women in engineering, in spite of some increases in the last two decades, continues to be anemic. Between 1983 and 2000 the percentage of female engineers in the U.S. workforce rose from 5.8 percent to just 10.9 percent... No matter how we look at these numbers and at related statistics, the conclusion is that we are not moving toward parity; by and large, we are not moving at all.

Young women are not dumb. The problem is not that they need to change. The problem is that we need to change. In the view of many young people, women especially, engineering represents a collection of majors that promise hard work during college, often in a tense and demanding atmosphere, with the prospect of ultimately gaining a stressful job of questionable permanence. What will help us most is not to say that this ain’t so, but to make it so that it ain’t.

Here are two ideas to start the process: whether we like it or not, the current engineering curriculum has demonstrated itself to be strongly oriented toward males. As unfashionable and unseemly as it may sound, the time may have come to try consciously to develop an engineering curriculum aimed deliberately at young women... One likely outcome may be that this new reengineered curriculum would also appeal to many talented men who are repelled by the same deficiencies of the current curriculum that have driven most women away.

Second, we need to work with industry and experts in occupational choices, labor, economy, psychology, and popular culture to develop new engineering workplace models. These models would be designed to be in better harmony with the tastes, sensitivities, lifestyle, and family obligations of the modern, educated middle-class woman. I realize this too may sound a bit out of style; after all, we are supposed to enjoy full equality and exhibit unquestionable sameness by now. However, the reality is that with only 10 percent of engineers who are women, the engineering workplace is anything but equal. In other professions and occupations the workplace evolution has occurred naturally, shaped by market forces and social pressures. In engineering we may have to give it a little push.

9.8

Dad?

'Santa' arrested after beating street sign

SAPULPA, Okla. --Police here know whether this particular Santa Claus has been naughty or nice. An officer responding to a call Christmas morning of a disturbance on the city's east side found James Lahl dressed as Santa Claus and hitting a street sign, according to a report.

Lahl, 53, had pulled a no parking sign from the ground and was beating another street sign with it, police allege.

As Officer Derrick Clayton approached the not-so-jolly St. Nick, he detected a strong odor of alcohol, and took Lahl into custody on a complaint of destruction of city property and public intoxication, according to the report.

Lahl, wearing a suit, hat, beard and gloves, remained in the Creek County jail on Monday.

Attempts to reach Lahl for comment were unsuccessful.

The Voice of Reason

The predictable overreaction of Boston fans to the Johnny Damon deal has
been well documented, as in these blog entries: @#$(%& Damon, Damon
Ruins Christmas, and Just another reason not to go to Fenway.

It seems foolish to point out how unreasonable fans can be in demanding loyalty from players. I expect to be chided with something like, "Duh, Bob, that's why they call them fanatics." But apparently the Boston Sports Guy also feels the need to be the voice of reason:

Anyway, if you're a Red Sox fan, I hope you learned two things this week. First, the Sox-Yankees feud matters infinitely more to us than it does to the players. That's why these guys have no problem switching sides. They just don't give a crap. Sadly, we do. And second, to paraphrase Ordway, it's almost always about the money.

- Damon, dollars and you

As long as I'm already going....

Son of Colts coach found dead

New York Jets coach Herman Edwards, one of Dungy's closest friends, called James a "very, very good kid."

This is a sad tragedy, and I'm not even trying to make a joke about it. But I didn't know Tony Dungy and Herm Edwards were close friends. When they hang out, do you think they ever get confused?

"Hey Herm, check this out!"

"Man, I've told you, I'm Tony, you're Herm."

Wait, that was on TV?

Survivor winner faces tax trial next year

You know, this is really funny to me because I distinctly remember an interview with Richard Hatch right after the first Survivor. Someone asked him how much he had left after taxes, and he said he still had the whole million in the bank. I figured he had consulted a tax attorney and had some financial plan other than, "hope no one from the IRS watches CBS."

Folks, the Rose Bowl this ain't

Heard during the broadcast of the New Orleans Bowl Tuesday night:

Announcer #1: This kid was leaning against an elevator door when it opened accidentally. He fell three stories and landed on his face.

Announcer #2: What a great story.

ASU end fights back after smashing fall

No booze you lose

No booze to be sold at Jets game next Monday

Okay, why do people go to the stadium again? Lets look at the head-to-head matchup:

	Living room	Stadium	Advantage
Admission	Free	Expensive	Living room
View	Always up-close in HD	Proportional to ticket price	Living room
Comfort	Recliner (warm and dry)	Cramped (cold and wet)	Living room
Booze	Cheap and plentiful	Expensive, long lines / unavailable	Living room
Atmosphere	Relatively calm	Exciting	Stadium

The only category the stadium has going for it is the live atmosphere. Even that's not so great when you're stuck next to a drunken idiot who's yelling incoherently and spilling beer everywhere. If I'm that guy, great, but I don't want to be stuck next to that guy. Or worse, you could be hit by a drunk driver and paralyzed on your way home. Hey kids, who wants another $5 hot dog?

Bob not smash baby

Since I am about to become a father, recently I've been told I seem more sensitive and philosophical. Hmmm...sensitive and philosophical, as in this exchange?

Bob: I want to break something.

Merv: How about that boat?

Bob: Well I don't want to break anything that someone would be upset about!

Professor Hulk

Professor Bob?

Firing on all cylinders

It looks like what I had hoped would happen is happening. In the last three games the Patriots have scored 79 points and allowed 10, with the one touchdown allowed during garbage time against the Bills. Granted, being AFC East Champs is nothing to brag about this year. But just like the Colts, they can only beat the teams they play.

UPDATE: And now the Chargers just snapped the Colts' run at a perfect record by doing the same thing the Patriots did to beat the Bucs: pressure the quarterback. Very interesting....

UPDATE UPDATE: A good point is made here. I admit I was mainly focused on the defensive performance.

Brady gets taken for granted, almost, and it's a tribute to his consistent greatness that a 65-percent, 258-yard, three-touchdown, no-pick performance against the NFL's No. 2 defense was barely discussed after the game.

Conspiracy theorists: At one point in the third quarter when the Pats were already up 21-0, the referees took a measurement and then awarded Tamba Bay a first down. From every angle shown, it looked clearly short to me. Were the refs trying to give TB a chance to get back into the game and make it interesting?

Wait. What?

Awesome Homebrew PSP Shooter

Why haven't I heard about this before now? Well, I don't own a PSP and therefore don't read news about it, that's why. But still, this is big. The specter of free, open-source games is deadly serious to the console industry, which relies on the "razor blade" business model: consoles are sold at or below cost, with the expectation that those costs (and hopefully profits) will be made up through game sales.

Microsoft uses the threat of withholding Live! service to prevent people from using hacked or modded games on their Xbox and Xbox360 consoles. And no free, open-source video game is likely to rival the experience of a multi-million dollar, studio-produced game any time soon. But with retail prices for next-generation titles creeping up to $60, demand for less expensive games may grow. The threat may not be imminent, but I think it is very real. Something to watch....

Hands team

Woman drops her baby from burning building



No way that just happened!

Has anyone ever played the game Bouncing Babies?



I used to play this game all the time on my 8088 with the amber monitor. If I wanted a real challenge I would hit the turbo button and kick it up to 8 MHz! This version has been modified to run on a modern PC. Enjoy! WARNING: Sound comes from the motherboard speaker, i.e. you can't turn it down.

Your Moment of Zen

Jackie Chan and Arnold vs Piracy

The first one is free

Now you can push the Life of Smiley onto your favorite RSS client, just like with Ilana's Blog.

UPDATE: If you want to publish your own blog this way, feedburner.com makes it really easy to do. Just go there and type in your blog address to get started.

If you use Gmail you can add the RSS feed to the new web clips bar. Pretty soon we will do everything through Google. Like lambs to the slaughter.

Baby Hell

Looking for baby shower gift ideas? I'm registered here.

If you can't win, cheat

Music Man Cracks DRM Schemes

We're all well aware of the ongoing battle between digital content providers and the hackers who continuously foil whatever new Digital Rights Management (DRM) scheme the providers come up with, either because they enjoy getting something for nothing, or simply because they enjoy the game. The content providers most definitely do not enjoy the game, undoubtedly because they keep losing. Perhaps their most embarrassing loss is the well-known DeCSS fiasco, in which the decryption algorithm for all DVDs on the market was so easily distributed, it wound up on t-shirts.

Content providers certainly have the right to protect their interests, and it is only natural for them to seek out new technology in preventing illegal copying of digital media. The problem arises when they cross the line between protecting their own interests, and interfering with the interests of others.

In 2003, DRM-maker SunnComm International introduced a new approach to copy protecting audio CDs in its MediaMax software...The software used a Microsoft Windows feature called AutoRun that executes software on a CD without the user's knowledge or consent...MediaMax secretly installs itself even if the user refuses to click on the license agreement giving it permission to do so...

The software "interfered with the user's ability to copy the audio CD at a kernel level," and also opened up the user's computer to security risks. In this case, it is the behavior of the DRM software itself that should be illegal.

If cheating doesn't work, threaten to sue

Holding down the Shift key stopped AutoRun and prevented the software from being installed. [24-year-old Princeton University researcher John "Alex"] Halderman wrote about the software, and the "infamous Shift key attack," in an academic paper and posted it online. Within 24 hours, SunnComm was threatening a $10 million lawsuit, and vowing to refer Halderman to authorities for allegedly committing a felony under the controversial Digital Millennium Copyright Act, or DMCA....In 2001, the recording industry briefly suppressed [Princeton professor Ed] Felten's research into a flawed digital-watermarking technology by threatening to invoke the DMCA.

Okay, here's the deal. It is illegal to copy and distribute digital content without a license. That's stealing, cut and dried. However, there is nothing wrong with pointing out a flaw in someone else's DRM scheme. It should not even be illegal to tell someone specifically how to disable a copy-protection scheme for the express purpose of illegally copying the protected content, as long as you're not doing it yourself. Questionable motives, maybe, but not illegal.

There's a reason the DMCA is controversial, for the same reason the Patriot Act is controversial. In protecting the rights of one individual or group, we cannot trample on the rights of another.

Which brings me to what's really bothering me lately.

Verizon is fascist

I was unhappy with Sprint's customer service, so I recently switched to Verizon. Of course they were eager to steal me away from a competitor, so they made it super-easy to port my numbers. One minute my number was active on my old Sprint phone, the next minute I was making and receiving calls on my new Verizon phone. So far, so good with the service. And I like my new phone. But I've already found something to complain about.

As with all cell phone companies, Verizon offers ringtones for download. Unlike Sprint, at least, Verizon prevents the phone from using any other sound files not purchased from Verizon. In fact, it even prevents me from recording a sound bite on my phone and using that as a ringtone, something which my phone's manual specifically says is possible. I asked Samsung about this, and they promptly replied:

Unfortunately it is hard to determine why new features are implemented in certain ways. At Samsung we design and manufacture mobile phones according to specifications set forth by mobile phone service providers, such as Verizon. Often times, the specifications are dictated to us and cannot be altered. Thus we are not able to provide a great deal of insight as to why a certain feature is not available, or behaves a certain way.

Now, this is what really burns me. If I want my phone to play "Crazy Train" whenever someone calls, I can pay Verizon $1.99 for this privilege. However, I can download the same song from iTunes for $0.99. Why shouldn't I then be allowed to use the iTunes song on my phone? That's fair use, right? If I can burn it to a CD, I can upload it to my phone. The point here is that Verizon is not protecting a copyright, they're protecting their business model. Even if I were willing to pay, what if I don't want any of Verizon's ringtones? Unless they're going to provide a library called "Anything Bob could say into his phone," they should keep their DRM hands off.

The meaning of patriotism

I didn't see R. Kelly's performance of the national anthem before the Hopkins/Taylor fight, but after reading Scoop Jackson's account, I want to (HBO rebroadcast: 12/10, 10 PM).

Only in America …

When Michael Buffer said his name before the fight, the room I was in grew quiet. Then it immediately got loud. Most times national anthems don't generate this type of reaction -- the fights or sporting events that follow them do. But in the words of the lil' great Huey Freeman: "Never underestimate how much n----s love R. Kelly."

Then the beat came in. Then the the panic set in. Then the camera panned out. Then … the phones started ringing.

OK, so my man Kells took the opportunity before the second act of Hopkins/Taylor, the second-biggest fight of the year, to Marvin Gaye the national anthem.

Give it some flavor, show it some love. Cool.

Wrong.

When the cameras showed that he was not in the ring alone -- when it showed that he had "steppers" (classically trained urban dancers) in the ring with him, "steppin'" in the name of patriotism with all the finesse of Herb Kent at the 50 Yard Line steppin' lounge -- it was enough to make Jeff Kent turn black.

Or John Chaney turn white.

But that wasn't it. The Pied Piper didn't stop there.

As he JB Monorailed himself through the lyrics, he then paused. Rode the break in the track, and sang out to the stunned folks in the crowd: "Put your hands together …"

OK, this negro has turned the anthem into a concert.

The phones started ringing again!

When it was all over, a sea of boos could be heard following him out of the ring.

Personally, I think the Star Spangled Banner sucks. I'm in favor of going back to the original anthem, America the Beautiful. You can hardly blame anyone for trying to make Francis Scott Key's anthem a bit more palatable. If R. Kelly's version managed to be more entertaining, than I'm all for it. Of course, I haven't seen it yet. It may have been a ridiculous debacle, somehow worse than the original. In which case he deserved to get booed.

And here's the bigger picture …

Only in America can someone who's standing trial for child pornography be asked to sing the country's national anthem.

In a sport that Don King once ruled.

Only in America.

Zombie Tiger Woods Y'all

Monsters of Photorealism

My hat is off to whoever designed the new King Kong game for the Xbox 360, because they've crafted a genuinely horrific monster. When it first lurched out of the mysterious tropical cave and fixed its cadaverous eyes on me, I could barely look at the monstrosity.

I'm speaking, of course, of Naomi Watts.

Not the actual Naomi Watts. She's heart-stoppingly lovely. No, I'm talking about the version of Naomi Watts that you encounter inside the game.

In some ways, her avatar is an admirably good replica, with the requisite long blond hair and juicy voice-acting from Watts herself. But the problem begins when you look at her face -- and the Corpse Bride stares back. The skin on virtual Naomi is oddly slack, as if it weren't quite connected to the musculature beneath; when she speaks, her lips move with a Frankensteinian stiffness. And those eyes! My god, they're like two portholes into a soulless howling electric universe. "Great," I complained to my wife. "I finally get to hang out with a gorgeous starlet -- and she's dead."

What's the culprit here? Ironically, the blame falls partly on the Xbox 360 itself, and its bleeding-edge graphics engine. Sure, the 360 can generate the most photorealistic human avatars of any game console in history. But that is precisely why they look so creepy.

This paradoxical effect has a name: the "Uncanny Valley." The concept comes from the Japanese roboticist Masahiro Mori, who argued that simulacra of humans seem lively and convincing so long as they're relatively low-resolution. Think of history's best comic strips: With only a few quick sketches on a page, Bill Watterson can create vivid emotions for the characters in Calvin and Hobbes. When an avatar is cartoonish, our brains fill in the gaps in the presentation to help them seem real.

But when human avatars approach photoreality? Something weird happens. Our brains rebel, and we begin focusing on the tiny details that aren't quite perfect. The realism of our avatars suddenly plunges downward into a valley -- and they begin to look like zombies.

My printer cartridge is almost out of liver

Printing Organs on Demand

Need a skin graft? A new trachea? A heart patch? Turn on your printer, and let it spit one out.

A group of researchers hope printers' whirs and buzzes will soon be saving lives.

Led by University of Missouri-Columbia biological physics professor Gabor Forgacs and aided by a $5 million National Science Foundation grant, researchers at three universities have developed bio-ink and bio-paper that could make so-called organ printing a reality.

So far, they've made tubes similar to human blood vessels and sheets of heart muscle cells, printed in three dimensions on a special printer.

"I think this is going to be a biggie," said Glenn D. Prestwich, the University of Utah professor who developed the bio-paper. "A lot of things are going to be a pain in the butt to print, but I think we can do livers and kidneys as well."